Sex problem in relationship

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Skip navigation! Story from Relationship Advice. Talking about sex is hard.

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Relationships are not easy, especially long-term ones. There are so many issues that can come between couples that often feel impossible to solve. But there are some relationship problems that can be fixed with sex.

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In an ideal world, every time you had sex would go off without a hitch. Unfortunately, reality doesn't work that way. As any couple's therapist can tell you, a variety of problems can arise when you're getting down to business.

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The word can evoke a kaleidoscope of emotions. From love, excitement, and tenderness to longing, anxiety, and disappointment—the reactions are as varied as sexual experiences themselves. On one level, sex is just another hormone-driven bodily function designed to perpetuate the species. Of course, that narrow view underestimates the complexity of the human sexual response.

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What can I do about them? The truth is, both men and women tend to complain about the same things when it comes to sex, particularly when they're in a long-term relationship. Here are eight of the most common complaints I hear from couples, along with suggestions to turn a partner's frown upside down.

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Sex in a new relationship is always pretty fantastic: It happens constantly, it's exciting to discover each other's bodiesand the two of you usually can't get enough of each other. If you're really lucky, the sex can last that way well into a long-term committed relationship, and you'll live happily sexually ever after. That said, sometimes sex between exclusive partners can start to dwindle over time.

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Most couples assume that true love is all it takes to hold a romantic relationship together forever. But if you want your relationship to feel exciting, passionate and memorable every single day, you definitely need to focus on sexual intimacy, just as much as you indulge in romantic gestures. Do you remember the time when you would have sex at every instance you got your hands on your lover?

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This can be simply down to the fact that sexual interest tends to ebb and flow over time. It can also be related to specific issues in the relationship or external pressures from outside it. Anxieties surrounding sex can also come from different expectations about how much sex you think you should be having.

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Although many experts believe that a majority of marriages today are in distress because of financial reasons, problems with sex and sexuality rank high, too. In fact, the topic of sex is the number one problem discussed in online relationship forums. It seems easier to talk to a stranger online than to your own partner!

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You're not alone. Focus Features. Sometimes, getting into a serious relationship means that sex becomes less, well, sexy.


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