Recover faster from male orgasm

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I am in an amazing relationship and I am so happy to have found someone I can truly be myself with. Our sex life is great; I rarely orgasm through penetrative sex which we discuss, and he always ensures that I orgasm another way, usually before he does. I know he genuinely loves me and I love him but I find this situation very frustrating.

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In human sexualitythe refractory period is usually the recovery phase after orgasm during which it is physiologically impossible for a man to have additional orgasms. While the refractory period varies widely among individuals, ranging from minutes to days, [4] [5] [6] most men cannot achieve or maintain an erection during this time, and many perceive a psychological feeling of satisfaction and are temporarily uninterested in further sexual activity; the penis may be hypersensitive and further sexual stimulation may feel painful during this time frame. An increased infusion of the hormone oxytocin during ejaculation is believed to be chiefly responsible for the male refractory period, and the amount by which oxytocin is increased may affect the length of each refractory period.

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But inside our bodies, scientific research is finding we're actually moving at very different speeds. Many women have been amazed — and perhaps a little disappointed — by how quickly their fellas orgasm. A woman climaxes when her uterus, vagina and anus contract simultaneously between six and 15 times, so that a climax usually lasts for between five and ten seconds.

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It's hard to say whether men or women have it better when it comes to sex. An argument in favor of women's superior sexual experience is that they can have multiple orgasms. An extremely small subset of men claim they can achieve this as well — as in have multiple orgasms ejaculations without losing their erection in between — but there's no good evidence that this ability exists.

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Here's how to inoculate ourselves against negative ones. Verified by Psychology Today. Save Your Sex Life.

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What's the rush? A recent survey of sex therapists in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that 7 to 13 minutes is the most desirable length of time for actual intercourse per session. During your downtime, focus on getting her off rather than getting it up, suggests Debby Herbenick, Ph.

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Women may be primed to go seconds after the first big win, but for men, it may not be so easy. What gives? Both women and men have a built-in recovery period after sex.

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After orgasm, most men need some downtime in order to rest, recover and regain an interest in sexual activity. This time is called the refractory period -- a period in which you switch from being actively excited by sexual activity to feeling somewhat disinterested in sex. Both men and women experience a refractory period after orgasm.

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Sometimes winding down leads right into starting up again. And indulging in a second mattress session could increase your orgasmic potential because, according to Joan Elizabeth Lloyd, who writes about sex, when your body is still turned on from a previous round, it's easier to climax. Plus, chances are your man won't come as quickly the second time, so he'll have more time to dedicate to pleasing you. But you can't just expect sex after sex.

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